For better, for worse. I doubt that many couples walk down the aisle thinking to themselves that “things only get worse from here.” Quite the contrary. Life begins anew with the planning of a future together and the hope for all good things. Dreams of what tomorrow will bring and the wonder of expectation is all aglow. Except sometimes bad things happen to good people and “worse” becomes inevitable.
For richer, for poorer. Everyone understands the cost of living. We work to establish credit just so we can go in debt to pay bills. I guess that’s the American way, or perhaps just the way of the world. But nobody ever stops to explain the cost of cancer, much less to newlyweds. What? That’s right, cancer. And not just any cancer, but stage 4 colon cancer that eventually spreads to the lungs, liver, spine, and brain. The real truth is, there is no amount of money that any one of us wouldn’t give to save the life of someone we love most. And when the money runs out, you just keep doing whatever it takes to make ends meet somehow … but ends don’t meet, and debt is debt, and cancer is more expensive than anyone can really fathom.
In sickness and in health. July 5th, 2019. A good enough anniversary date to celebrate six years of wedded bliss. Well, maybe the first four weren’t so bad but the last two-year stretch hasn’t exactly been what anybody would call a picnic. First one diagnosis then another, radiation treatments, chemotherapy, surgery after surgery after surgery, flushing “Bili-bags” and the toilet more than any anybody ever vowed to do, and watching life literally being stolen right before your very eyes. “Into me, back to you.” Happy Anniversary, indeed!
To love and to cherish. Ah, now that’s the part that was right from the start. Loving each other for all the right reasons. Sacrificing one’s needs for the other and making sure that not a day went by without saying, “I love you more than life itself” … and meaning it. Holding onto their faith in God and to each other no matter the storm, knowing that all would be well with their souls because of a love that no man, or woman, or disease, could ever put asunder.
Till death do us part. It was simple and quiet. Poignant, yet beautiful. She was at home surrounded by her loving family and one faithful husband who endured everything with her, and then some. She is healed and finally whole. I believe if she could return for even a moment, that what she would want you and me to know is it’s true. Everything she passionately lived for and gave her love to with no boundaries; everything that she suffered through with grace and that she died boldly believing in … is all true.
We don’t often realize in the course of everyday living — and dying — that we’re rubbing elbows with angels. Well done, Songbird. Well done.
Jan Smith
August 2019
